Being More Sensitive to the Needs of Others

Being More Sensitive to the Needs of Others

Many people wrongly see sensitivity as a weakness, especially regarding leaders. They often believe that being strong, decisive, and assertive is the only way to succeed without realizing that sensitivity can be a significant strength. It helps leaders connect with their teams personally, genuinely understanding their struggles, celebrating wins, and being there during tough times.

A sensitive leader doesn’t shy away from problems or avoid tough choices. Instead, they make decisions with empathy, considering how their choices affect others. They also lead with honesty. They’re okay with being vulnerable, admitting they don’t have all the answers, and asking for feedback. This creates a workplace where everyone feels safe, respected, and inspired.

Being sensitive doesn’t mean lowering your standards or slowing down productivity. Sensitivity can help you get the most out of your team. When you’re aware of what others are going through—like stress from a heavy workload or the need for recognition—you can respond in ways that make people feel understood. By noticing and addressing these things, you show your team that they’re more than just employees; they’re individuals who count.

In his book The Purpose-Driven Life, Rick Warren discusses what motivates people and the deeper reasons behind our actions and choices. He points out that our lives are usually influenced by one of five main things: guilt, anger and resentment, fear, materialism, or the need for approval. These motivations shape how we live, get along with others, and even feel about ourselves. Before connecting with others, it is essential to understand what truly motivates us.

1. Many People Are Driven by Guilt

Guilt is one of the biggest things that can hold people back. A strong emotion can trap us in the past, constantly replaying our mistakes, failures, or regrets. Many people find themselves haunted by things they’ve done or wish they’d handled differently. When guilt takes over, we feel we don’t deserve happiness, success, or forgiveness. This can lead us to sabotage our lives or settle for less because we don’t deserve any better.

Living with guilt often means avoiding people or situations that remind us of our blunders. When guilt drives the bus, it’s like living under a cloud that keeps us from truly enjoying life. But there’s good news. We don’t have to live in guilt. The good news is that God’s plan for us isn’t based on guilt. Instead, He offers forgiveness and a chance to start fresh for anyone who wants it. Letting go of guilt helps us move forward and frees us from those past regrets. When we swap out guilt for a sense of purpose, we can live a fuller, more rewarding life filled with growth and grace. 

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come."

- 2 Corinthians 5:17 (ESV)

2. Many People Are Driven by Anger and Resentment

Anger and resentment can take over our lives, often resulting from unresolved pain or feelings of injustice. Angry or bitterness is normal when someone wrongs us or causes us pain. But if we let those feelings control our lives, we end up stuck in negative thoughts, fixating on the past instead of moving on.

Many studies show that people stuck in anger and resentment often find themselves repeatedly reliving pain. Instead of letting it go, they cling to the hurt, replaying what happened and dwelling on the injustice. This thinking can hold us back, affecting our relationships, job choices, and happiness. Living a life fueled by anger can create bitterness that impacts us and those around us.

Instead of letting anger steer our lives, we should think about forgiveness. Forgiving doesn’t mean we’re saying what happened was okay, but it does help us drop the emotional weight we carry. By choosing to forgive, we free ourselves from being trapped by old grievances and open ourselves up to a life full of purpose and personal growth.

3. Many People Are Driven by Fear

Fear is a strong motivator, and it can come from all kinds of sources, such as childhood experiences, personal failures, or toxic relationships. When fear takes the wheel, we get stuck in a “what if” mindset. This often leads us to avoid taking risks, pass up opportunities, or hold ourselves back because we're scared of failing, being judged, or getting hurt.

When consumed by fear, we tend to stay within tight boundaries, missing out on chances to grow or try new things. Fear can also mess with how we see ourselves and others, making us distrustful or always expecting the worst. Living like that is draining and gets in the way of experiencing true joy and fulfillment.

The key to breaking free from a fear-driven life is faith. Faith means trusting in something bigger than ourselves, which helps us tackle our fears with courage and confidence. When we shift our mindset from fear to faith, we can face life with optimism and welcome new experiences, knowing a higher purpose supports us.

"do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus."

- Philippians 4:6-7 (ESV)

4. Many People Are Driven by Materialism

Many people are driven by materialism, which involves wanting more stuff, money, and status. In a world where success is often measured by how much we own, it's easy to think that having more will make us happier or more fulfilled. 

Chasing material possessions often leads to an endless pursuit of wealth, yet it seldom brings true satisfaction. We constantly seek the next item, never genuinely feeling content or at peace.

When materialism takes over, our sense of self and worth tends to become tied to what we own instead of who we are. We start defining ourselves by how much we have instead of what we value or stand for. The truth is that no amount of money or things can fill the emptiness that only a purposeful life can.

To break free from a materialism-driven life, we should focus on lasting values rather than temporary things. Real purpose isn't about collecting things; it's about living meaningfully and serving others with love. When we prioritize purpose, we see that our true worth comes from how we live and how we impact the lives around us, not from our possessions.

5. Many People Are Driven by Approval

Approval-seeking is a pretty common motivation that influences many people’s lives. Many of us need acceptance from our parents, partners, friends, or society. When we live our lives trying to gain approval, we often end up changing who we are just to fit in. This constant chase for validation can cause anxiety and make us feel insecure, leading to a disconnect from our true selves.

Trying to seek approval is a losing game because people’s opinions constantly change. If you base your life on what others think, you feel vulnerable and uncertain, continually bending to meet others’ expectations. Living for approval usually leaves you unfulfilled because you suppress your true desires and passions to achieve what you believe other people want.

Instead of focusing on approval, we should look for a bigger life purpose. When we focus on something greater than ourselves, we break free from the pressure of meeting others’ expectations. Having a sense of purpose gives us the strength to live authentically, embracing who we are without needing validation from others.

(to be continued)